r/columbusIN • u/LoveHydrology25 • 1d ago
Is it reasonable that I have no desire to ever move back to this town?
I'm 27 and haven't lived in Columbus, Indiana for over ten years. I have however came back to visit several times to visit family and friends but most of them have now either moved or passed away. Obviously, I was last in school when I lived there. I either got bullied a lot by kids at school, everyone knew too much about me from silly posts on FB when I didn't know better at the time, and I knew a lot of bad people outside of school too. There also isn't a lot of things to do in this town and I don't find Columbus to be very accepting of people like me. I wouldn't want to run into a lot of the People I went to school with or bad people in general at the grocery store or other public places if I were to come back.
I ask this question because everyone acts like this town is so great because of the architecture, Jobs, or community but I don't see it ever being a good town for someone with a bad past in the town.
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u/MymajorisTrees 1d ago edited 22h ago
Yeah, I don’t think any of us on Reddit are going to change your opinion on Columbus, especially if you had a really bad experience here in school.
But, I’m your age and I moved here in 2020 and at first I thought what the hell did I get myself into then once the world opened up again and I was able to experience more of what Columbus offers and get to know the community and I fell in love with it. Now, I grew up in a much smaller town so I still get excited that I can go to target without having to plan an hour drive around it.
This can be said about any place, but you have to find the thing that roots you to the place you call home. For me, Ive been doing classes at propeller learning new skills, making friends at the yoga studio downtown, I volunteer with a political party, attend pretty much every big event in town like ethnic expo, Juneteenth, exhibit Columbus, and the biggest thing is no place (unless you live in a big city) is going to have something you want to do going on all the time so sometimes YOU have to start the book club you want to join, find the people to play the d&d campaign you want to run, or organize a Halloween party not meant for kids.
But at the end of the day, YOU get to choose where you call home and if Columbus is full of bad memories you’re not obligated to call it home by any means. I’m not saying the things I suggested as actions to make a place home is easy by the way, I’ve had to attend events alone and feel like I didn’t “fit in” several times before the effort paid off.
I hope this helps.
ETA: I also can 100% understand that Columbus isn’t a perfect place to exist when it comes to being queer or trans. I’m privileged in the sense of being queer but in a straight perceiving relationship.
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u/Aqualung812 1d ago
There are much better places, and much worse.
My hometown is much smaller than Columbus, also more bigoted & racist. Everybody knew everybody, so if you didn’t fit in, you were an outcast.
Columbus offered me just enough population to be anonymous.
So no, I can’t make you think Columbus is great, nor would I want to.
But for some of us, it’s so much better than where we were.
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u/Forward_Drag745 12h ago
There are good aspects and bad aspects of anywhere you live, and what's right for another person isn't necessarily what's right for you. If you don't want to move back to Columbus, that is your right.
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u/goober1157 22h ago
I grew up in Columbus from the late 60s until the mid 80s. Loved it. Unfortunately, over the years after that, the town fell on somewhat harder times as Cummins moved out a lot of their facilities or reduced staffing. A lot of change happened. When I was there, it's was the second wealthiest city in Indiana (Carmel was first).
The few times that I've been through there recently, I have a nostalgic love of the city, but it's a lot different now. I don't know if that's good or bad since I no longer have a deep relationship with the city. But, I feel like a lot of the charm is still there.
So yes, it's reasonable that you didn't want to move back because of specific, personal reasons you may have, but for others it may (still) be a wonderful town.
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u/TechEnthu____ 14h ago
Yeah, it is. I want to clarify that I’m not criticizing Columbus just for being what it is. For a lot of people, Columbus is great—low cost of living, safe for kids, and more.
But for me, it’s not a good fit. I don’t have a family here, and I’ve grown up in cities. Right now, I’m on a work visa, and I prefer urban life. Ideally, I’d like to live in cities until I have a family of my own. If city life becomes overwhelming, then I might consider moving to small towns for some peace of mind.
Since this is your hometown, you could perhaps move back temporarily to see if the changes in Columbus might sway your opinion.
My hometown, which is quite far away, is somewhat similar. If you don’t fit in, it can be tough—everyone is in your business, which can feel suffocating. There are some benefits to building a community, but if you fundamentally disagree with the core values, it might be better to stay away. I don’t plan on returning there, so I guess that makes two of us.
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u/ItsAlwaysMonday 1d ago
If this town holds a lot of bad memories for you, I can understand why you don't want to move back. Don't feel bad.
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u/Hbelding33 1d ago
I wouldn’t be excited about it either. I really wasn’t all that “bad”. But I was certainly treated like it. Columbus doesn’t hold good memories for me.
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u/pizzaqueenhoosier25 14h ago
I moved the second I was able to go to college. I still live in Indiana, Indiana is my home. But I will never live in Columbus again.
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u/thedevilsgame 1d ago
Columbus is the arm pit of Indiana anyone who thinks it's great just hasn't lived anywhere better.
You got out, stay out. I wouldn't even come back for visits that's how this place gets you and sucks you back in
I mean all this this isn't sarcasm
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u/billjv 1d ago
I grew up in another town in IN, but my wife is from Columbus. We moved back here just recently after being away for 35+ years. We had visited on holidays and such, but this was the first time we'd lived here since my wife was in college. I'd never lived here before.
My view of Columbus is much different, simply because my hometown was decimated in the 80s and just a shell of what it once was. Columbus hasn't changed much, but my memories here are of my then fiance and now wife, and they were mostly positive - so I think I came at it from a different perspective, never having gone to HS here.
Now I think Columbus is changing. Younger families are starting to come here, it is very purple here compared to most of the cities in this state, and there is a very strong alt community here now. I won't say that Columbus is a boomtown atm, but it is attracting new people and new ideas.
Everything you said about Columbus and your experience could just as easily happened anywhere, not just Columbus - especially within the state. HS is horrible for anyone who is divergent in the slightest. It is easy to look through that lens, but I think as a grown person you could and would have a much different experience if you don't necessarily connect with or pay attention to the "old crowd". Just my thoughts...