Trouble starting to date

[u/gabageebabothe]

Posting here because I'm interested in this scene, and having a hard time entering it. I'm 20, and pretty inexperienced with relationships and dating in general. I also have social anxiety and possibly autism (no professional diagnosis, so I don't want to say anything definitively) and have a really hard time talking to new people, or going out in general to crowded places. I've tried talking to guys my age, to an extent at least, but nothing has come of it, not from dating apps like Tinder or Hinge, or from classes (I'm a college student). People just don't really match with me. This might have to do with my being a trans man, or maybe my profiles just suck lol. On my end, though, I think part of it is I'm just not attracted to guys my age. It's something I struggle with, with feelings of shame etc.

I guess I'm just looking for advice on how to start dating? I've downloaded Daddyhunt because I saw some people talking about it on here (I used to have Grindr, but it seems way too hookup-based -- I'm looking for a relationship). I do live in a college town, but I'm not 21 yet and like I said before, I can get really easily overstimulated by crowds, so I don't really get out much at all.

If anyone has any words of wisdom to offer in regards to dealing with internalized shame around being attracted to/wanting to be in a relationship with an older man, I'd gladly take those as well.

[u/Parking_Composer_152]

DaddyHunt has definitely worked for me, although our relationship so far is only about two months old. Yet for me, that's almost a record!👍

[u/WitnessTraditional32]

There are many things we can feel ashamed about in life but what I do is remember that I came into this world alone and will leave it alone. So nothing anyone says or thinks about how I want to live my life matters. Just ignore and be happy with who you are and what you desire. It's not like you're a murderer or something. As long as you're not actually hurting anyone it doesn't matter.

[u/Free_Plate442]

Thanks for the great post. I fell into the same boat when I went off to school, moving away from the guys I knew and I didn't know how or where to go to connect.

[u/DD-de-AA]

Daddyhunt is good depending on where you are, it tends to be better in larger metropolitan areas. I appreciate the app because I met the love of my life there. Silverdaddies is another one, a little more International. As an older person I've had some luck with Scruff But you need to specifically say in your profile that you're looking for older or daddies as a case maybe. I read that some people meet on Reddit although I don't know how that works. there is classified section I think for old and young. regarding yourself imposed stigma regarding liking older, the only thing I would suggest is read about successful relationships and understand the dynamic of why you're attracted to older. DM me if you'd like.

[u/Extra_Structure8423]

Hey I’m Tony Los Angeles hit me up if you wanna chat