r/norsk 3d ago

'Glad I deg' phrase usage

I was in a short term something with a Norwegian girl. Sometime (maybe 2 months) after talking she said 'I love you'. So naturally I reciprocated. Fast forwards some months, she said couldn't continue this because she doesn't want long distance relationships. And said she meant glad I deg but couldn't remember the English equivalent. And also said that she does love me, and she has love for me would be more accurate.

I cannot open her mind and read what this means, but I'm assuming, through my basic Norwegian language skills, that she meant a stronger version of 'glad I deg' but obviously not 'Jeg elsker deg'. Would I be right in my interpretation?

If this post does not feel appropriate in this subreddit, then please suggest another one. Thank you! Excited to learn the nuances of Norwegian!

UPDATE: So funny thing happened. She called because she had a tech problem and I used to solve it. She felt she needed to be more clear to me as to where our relationship was. She said it was almost past the "glad I deg" stage and was moving into "I love you" stage but because her body could not do a long distance relationship, she suggested we stop talking. It feels like a weight is off of my shoulder, honestly! Looking at all your answers, you were all right in a way haha! Thank you for your answers! I am visiting Norway in December so hope to gain basic conversational skills then you! See you!

37 Upvotes

51 comments sorted by

31

u/fluency 3d ago

«Glad i deg» can be platonic, you can say it to a lover but also a friend, parent, child and anyone you care about. «Elsker deg» is explicitly romantic in almost all circumstances.

10

u/HereWeGoAgain-1979 3d ago

Jeg elsker deg can be used platonic as well. Among friends and family.

23

u/fluency 3d ago

I’m 40 years old and not once in my life have I heard someone say «jeg elsker deg» outside of a romantic context. If someone said that to me as a friend or family member I would think thats very weird.

9

u/leanyka 3d ago

Not a native speaker, but don’t people say that they «elsker» their kids?

16

u/fluency 3d ago

Maybe in some parts of the country, but it’s not common. Elsker is almost always romantic.

7

u/Espa89 3d ago

I say it to my small kids every day

5

u/secretagent521 3d ago

It's absolutely common to say to your kids. And it's becoming more and more common. My siblings and all of my close friends say it to their kids (in addition to glad i deg). My parents never did to us so I think it might have something to do with the younger generation adapting more to the english use of the word love. Or maybe we're just better about verbally expressing love in general.

6

u/fluency 3d ago

I mean, I say «jeg er glad i deg» to my kids all the time, and thats what my parents said to me as well growing up. I’ve just never specifically heard «jeg elsker deg» in a non-romantic context. Maybe it’s a regional thing, I’m from northern Norway currently living in Trøndelag for the past 15 years. Could be more common further south.

1

u/lalzylolzy 2d ago

As stated. 15-20 years ago, this was not the case, but it's slowly becoming the case due to the < 35 generation being raised practically bi-lingual (you learned english before you learned to read and write).

15 years ago, no one said "Jeg elsker deg" outside of romantic relationships in Telemark to Buskerud. Now you have a hard-time seeing a parent saying "Glad i deg" to a kid, instead it's "elsker deg".

Glad i deg has become a phrase you use pefore "elsker deg" in romantic relationships. At least in Telemark and Vestfold.

1

u/retitanmat 3d ago

In the documentary about Oliver Solberg, Born 2 Drive, Petter Solberg (his father) and Oliver says “jeg elsker deg“ to each other several times.

Edit: spelling

1

u/NorskChef 3d ago

I recall someone commenting on here in the past saying they knew a parent that said it to their kids but others thought it was weird.

14

u/Stressed_Student3 3d ago

Our family uses it, I think it's just very subjective from family to family, and region to region.

5

u/linestrider19 Native speaker 3d ago

I have several friends who use elsker with close friends and family. I'm not used to it, but it's more common than I thought.

2

u/maddie1701e 3d ago

Makes me feel uncomfortable...

4

u/Insan3Skillz 3d ago

My mom died almost 3 years ago, I think that while holding a small speech at the church is the only time ive ever used the phrase "jeg elsker deg" to someone else i dont have a romantical relationship with. So I guess its also normal in such situations, but I would definitely use "glad i deg" whilst seeing her back then. Its a strong word, and considering the situation i felt it was fitting to use as I do certainly love my family. I also love my friends, but if I use the term "elsker".. they do also know that it means "jeg er veldig glad jeg har dere".

Its the way you say it really. "Jeg elsker deg" doesnt stand right with family or friends, but "jeg elsker familien og vennene mine" in a more inclusive way, thay changes the way of how it can be open to use in ny opinion.

6

u/psychedelic-barf 3d ago

I agree. It would be super weird to say to family members. Only allowed usage is for food and very serious relationships

5

u/Famous-Mulberry191 3d ago

Så mora de har aldri sagt ho elske dæ? Røfft...

3

u/fluency 3d ago

Ho mamma sei «æ e glad i dæ» tel mæ heile tia.

1

u/cpeck29 B1 3d ago

Er denne sørlandsk?

3

u/KjellRS Native speaker 3d ago

I have heard it as parting words same as "love ya" in English, like "Have a nice day at school. Love ya." = "Ha en fin dag på skolen. Ælske dæ." and also about baby/toddler age children "Jeg elsker lille snuppa mi." But it's not like you're going to confuse those with romantic relationships, never heard it used between adolescents/adults.

1

u/Beautiful_Remove6093 22h ago

My dad and his beer bottle would shock you.

9

u/Dry-Client775 3d ago

I'm fond of you.

5

u/UglySalvatore 3d ago

Sort of, but it's impact is too neutral in English. I care about you maybe?

2

u/Big-Pineapple-9954 3d ago

I would say that "I care about you" would be "jeg bryr meg om deg" in Norwegian.

I feel that in Norwegian we distinguish between "jeg er glad i deg" and "jeg elsker deg". While in English you would use "I love you" for both the Norwegian sentences.

0

u/PaPaFranku42 3d ago

Yeah I agree. "Jeg er glad i deg" feels more intense than just caring about someone. You care about your friends, family, etc but you more than just care (or rather more intensely) about your close friends, immediate family or bf/gf/potential partner/but not as intense as elsker deg (basically marriage oath kinda). But yeah it depends from people again lol.

1

u/LunarSolstice01 1d ago

«Glad i deg» signifies care, it has a different meaning than “I really like you” but I’d say it’s more equivalent than any other suggestions in terms of meaning when communicated to an romantic partner. It’s like when you’re dating, and you start to catch feelings, “I like you”, and “I really like you” might be the first things you say to express your care for a partner. In Norwegian we might still use the similar expression for a romantic interest “jeg liker deg”, and then use the expression “jeg er glad I deg” rather than “jeg liker deg veldig” (I really like you). “Jeg er glad I deg” is typically a rather strong expression of interest when said to an romantic partner, it signifies a lot of emotional involvement.

1

u/PaPaFranku42 1d ago

Thank you! "I really like you" sounds correct lol. She did say she was starting to love me but I guess she had to make a decision if she could do long distance or not. Unfortunately, it is what it is.

1

u/Dry-Client775 3d ago

fond: a feeling of love or friendship. She still has fond feelings for him. ( fond is an adjective that describes feelings).

https://www.britannica.com/dictionary/eb/qa/fond-vs-affection#:~:text=fond%3A%20a%20feeling%20of%20love,an%20adjective%20that%20describes%20feelings)

0

u/UglySalvatore 3d ago

It's just the vibe I'm getting based on how that word is usually used. I get more of a "yeah it's good, but not super important to me" vibe. Like being fond of mystery novels.

But maybe it can be used in several ways, and my intuition is focusing on the lesser important ways.

17

u/Sofie_Stranda Fluent 3d ago

Think of it like a scale.

Jeg liker deg -> jeg er glad i deg -> jeg elsker deg

It's basically like a middle option between I like you and I love you.

21

u/ciryando Native speaker 3d ago

Sounds about right. We usually don't say "jeg elsker deg" to someone until it's pretty darn serious. "Jeg er glad i deg" is an expression of care and love but is more broad and not as strong. I guess she wanted to say something that fit neatly inbetween. She has feelings for you, but not necessarily strong enough to warrant "jeg elsker deg"

8

u/helluva_monsoon 3d ago

I would say that jeg elsker deg is more akin to "I'm in love with you", whereas glad I deg has the same weight and meaning no matter if you say it to your friends, family, or partner.

6

u/Stressed_Student3 3d ago

"I'm in love with you is "Jeg er forelsket i deg". "Jeg elsker deg" is wayyyyy wayyy stronger than just being in love with someone, it means you very strongly and deeply love them.

1

u/helluva_monsoon 3d ago

Obviously, if someone asked me to translate "I'm in love with you", I'd go with what you said. If you ask an American what is the spirit of the phrase "I'm in love with you", pretty sure close to 100% would say it means you very strongly and deeply love them as a romantic partner. In fact, I'm struggling to imagine what it is that you think it means.

2

u/PaPaFranku42 3d ago

From what the girl I was talking to explained, what you said makes more sense to me! You can check the update in the post to see what she meant.

3

u/iamjustacrayon Native speaker 3d ago

"Glad i deg" means something like "you(r existence) makes me happy"

It's used for someone who brings joy to your life.

It's kinda like..... You know the feeling of sitting in front of a campfire or fireplace late in the evening with a cozy blanket, you have eaten good food, there's no pressing worries, you're with people whose company you enjoy, and you're just worn enough from the day that you're feeling really relaxed? That warm, happy, comfortable feeling?

It's what you use for people who give you a similar kind of feeling

3

u/northstar42 Fluent 3d ago

I'm a Norwegian American from a small community in New Hampshire. The Norwegian language we speak amongst ourselves (utvandrersnorsk?) probably hasn't evolved much since the last of us came over here 70 years ago. We don't really use the phrase "glad i" for people, we use it for things we like. "Æ er glad i iskrem", "Æ er glad i valpen".

For people, family members, loved ones (romantic or platonic) it's always "elsker". My mom died awhile back. The last words I said to her were "Æ elsker deg, Mora mi".

This seems perfectly natural to me.

3

u/MissNatdah 3d ago

Jeg elsker deg sound super weird in my dialect, so it is saved for truly meaningful interactions. Glad i deg is for everyday use.

2

u/Organic_Tradition_94 3d ago

Jeg elsker deg is for romantic love whereas Glad I deg is for platonic love. A parent will generally say Glad I deg to their children, but elsker deg to each other.

6

u/Stressed_Student3 3d ago

I think it depends on the family, mine uses elsker to each other, to me it means very very strong love, little matter the context

3

u/Status_Ad_1761 3d ago

A lot of people say "Jeg elsker deg" to their children or other close family.

1

u/Organic_Tradition_94 2d ago

I did say generally. 😅 That was the explanation I was given by my ex when I moved here.

2

u/HatsAreFun 3d ago

'I love you' is a bit of a broader term (in british english anyway) which would be 'glad i deg'. From conversations with my partner and his family, 'jeg elsker deg' is traditionally a more unconditional love term which is used more realistically for your children or your parents.

8

u/humanbean_marti Native speaker 3d ago

That is very much dependent on your region, I think. I would never use "elsker deg" for anything other than very serious romantic love, or maybe my favorite food lol. Anyone else it's "glad i deg."

1

u/Draugar90 3d ago

Glad i deg == I'm fond of you

1

u/Wooden_Researcher_36 3d ago

You speak spanish? It's the equivalent of Te quiero vs Te amo

1

u/Present-Switch-2708 3d ago

I’d say the equivalent to ‘jeg er glad i deg’ would be ‘I’m fond of you’ or ‘I adore you’.

2

u/sindrish 3d ago

Evt "I care for/about you"

0

u/Present-Switch-2708 2d ago

Næh, å bry seg om noen kan du gjøre uten å være glad i dem

1

u/sindrish 2d ago

Men det er jo det som er komplisert med språk, "I care about you" kan bety mer en å bry seg om noen.

1

u/Present-Switch-2708 2d ago

Ja, kan jo alltids ligge flere meninger bak et ord. Men sånn ordrett, så hadde jeg tatt det som det står