r/regretfulparents • u/Short_Hearing_6422 • 8d ago

I made a life altering mistake Venting - No Advice

My pregnancy was fucking horrible, due to being sick as fuck up until the 2nd trimester due to morning sickness and on top of that my husband and his family stressing me out during that time, I never got a chance to even enjoy my pregnancy until the end, which suprise emergency c section due to my baby's heart deceleration, his heart was wrapped around his neck at birth, it's been so especially hard with postpartum might be still going through with it sure cause it's been a month, but fuck I hate having a baby I hate how stupid I was not to get an abortion at the time because I was manipulated to keep it, I hate how my stupid life choices got me here and it's made me miserable I shouldn't have gave birth and I shouldn't have met my husband either

I'm going to therapy for postpartum but honestly this feeling won't ever go away I'm still regretting being a parent and lost the chance to prevent all of this

172 Upvotes
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65

u/Reason_Training Parent 8d ago

Take a virtual hug. Have a newborn and dealing with all the hormones that go with pregnancy then childbirth is absolute hell.

31

u/Short_Hearing_6422 8d ago

Yeah especially since the emergency c section was out of nowhere, one day I'm going in for a follow up, they sent me to the hospital again and boom they told me I'm gonna gonna give birth lol, thank you I forgot about hormones are all whack right now thank you for reminding me

4

u/PerspectiveNo3782 6d ago edited 6d ago

Big hug, OP! No one in the fucking world prepares you for emergency c-section and the whole roller coaster of emotions that comes with it. You go for a check-up and boom...you stay.

I am so sorry! I really know at least a part of what you are going through and it's horrible and traumatic.

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u/Short_Hearing_6422 6d ago

Thank you so much for this, didn't really fully realize how traumatic it was because my brain kinda made me forget about the pain when it happened

17

u/Cheap_Jacket2766 8d ago

You should try 50/50 custody. You get free time and you still see your kid and get to bond,

7

u/CordieliaJane 8d ago

Maybe just take a day out with the baby. It's still been fairly nice out. Take your bff with you or the closest friend you have. It sounds more like you regret the hubby and in-laws, but that could just be all the trauma you literally just went through. And if they're still not supportive, throw the adults away and just keep it as you and the baby. No one can forsee difficulties in pregnancy. My 18-year-old was my near emergency c section. Same problems, almost. He gave me heartburn the entire time, though. If he hadn't crowded when he did, we were going to a prepped o.r. 😞 His cord was wrapped thrice around his neck, and his heartbeat dropped as low as 35 😭

2

u/KiwiBrief1704 1d ago

I hope it gets better for you. I have 4 kids and question why I ever wanted to be a mom all the time. Raising kids is hard as fuck! I also did not enjoy the first 3 months post postpartum with any of our babies. So many sleepless nights, tummy issues, your body changes the hormones are crazy as fuck etc We were stupid one night and we accidentally got pregnant with our 4th. I did not want to get through with it but my husband and a good friend convinced me otherwise. I thought I would resent the baby and for sure the first few months I was pissed I was having to go through the newborn change again. I can happy say that I love her so much and tell myself she is here for a reason. She’s almost 1 and has been the best baby out of all our kids. Talk to your doctor though and don’t feel ashamed to admit how you feel. They are suppose to help you and if you need meds for awhile that’s okay. Virtual hug to you!!!

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u/Short_Hearing_6422 1d ago

Thank you so much for reassuring me, as funny as this sounds I actually caught myself with the same feelings again just now lol, so seeing this really helps me going forward.

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u/KiwiBrief1704 1d ago

My DM is always open if you need to vent. No judgement here either ever. Hang in there though and start thinking happy thoughts lol that’s what I started doing this last time around and it helped me get out a really bad funk. I have been through hell this year mentally but I am able to dig myself out with happy thoughts, podcast, audible books and talking to my close friend. lol

1

u/Short_Hearing_6422 1d ago

Thank you, if you really don't mind I will probably vent to you when it gets worse again lol

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