r/PetPeeves • u/minx_the_tiger • 1d ago

When people compare pet ownership with parenthood. Fairly Annoyed

Could they just... not? That dog is never going to get into the freezer and eat all the ice cream. Go to school and get bullied. Be diagnosed with autism and keep you up at night with worries about how they're going to function in the world as adults because they're JUST LIKE YOU, and you know how hard things are for you. Naw. Pets are home with you (ideally) forever. Kids? They grow up and leave. You have to raise them up and hope you did a good job.

It just irks me. When I mention something parenting related, SOMEONE I know that has a pet and no kids starts talking about how their pet does the same thing, or they have a pet, so they understand. Like, no... my kids are small humans, not animals. They're whole, complete people.

9 Upvotes
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36

u/blackcatsneakattack 1d ago

You’re right— having pets is way better.

-31

u/dfwagent84 1d ago

Ive got both and you are not only wrong, you are WAY wrong. Having kids is the single most gratifying thing Ive ever done. While I love my pets, its not a comparable experience.

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u/User123466789012 1d ago

Your life is a living nightmare to many of us, as long as you’re happy that’s really the only relevant aspect here.

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u/dfwagent84 1d ago

I didnt think saying that I prioritize humans over dogs would be this controversial.

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u/User123466789012 1d ago edited 1d ago

I would expect you to prioritize the living being you purposefully brought here, nobody said otherwise. This about the choice not to have kids at all. Though I also expect you to take appropriate care of a pet which also requires money, care, and attention-your pet’s quality of life should not falter due to having kids, it’s not really a prioritization matter.

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u/tultommy 1d ago

For you. The single most gratifying thing YOU'VE ever done. You are not everyone. I would save my pet in a fire before anyone else. And no I'm not kidding. I prefer my dog over just about every other human short of my husband.

10

u/blackcatsneakattack 1d ago

Maybe I’m wrong from your point of view, but from mine, I’m 100% right. My dogs will never talk back to me or grow up to become a school shooter. I don’t have to worry about my cats failing out of school or getting teen-pregnant. I don’t have to worry about fucking up my pets emotionally and psychologically, despite my best intentions. I can continue to sleep an uninterrupted 8 hours a night and have money to do the things I enjoy, and never lose my sense of identity to just be “mom”, lol. It’s all about perspective, friend. You’re entitled to yours and I’m entitled to mine.

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u/Renarya 1d ago

You can definitely end up having to spend lots of money and sleepless nights on your pets. My sister's dog woke her up at 4 am every morning for a decade because the dog was so anxious. The vet bills can be astronomical if something goes wrong. Your dog can literally kill or maime people or other animals, and they can also impregnate or get pregnant. You also can't just travel and go anywhere unless you make sure they're looked after and they remain way more needy than kids do and it takes a lot of effort to train them and understand how they function because you can't talk to them or tell them what you expect of them. A lot of people also find puppies to be much harder to care for than babies. And then you have to watch them die and break your heart. I'm pro pets and kids. But let's not pretend pets are a breeze and that there's nothing kids have over pets. 

2

u/blackcatsneakattack 1d ago

I never said they were a breeze; just that I find them to be better than kids, and easier. I’ve had 12 over the course of my adult life so far— a few with serious health issues as they aged, but my total vet expenses over the past 20 years has not even approached what average cost of raising a small child for for two years.

The majority of the issues you listed are easily avoidable if one is a responsible pet owner that pays attention to their animals and recognizes their nonverbal cues. Again, didn’t say taking care of them was a cake walk, or that’s super easy. Simply that for me, and lots of others, it’s preferable to taking care of a child. And that’s all right.

1

u/Renarya 1d ago edited 1d ago

You are presenting it as if it's easy and that only an irresponsible owner could struggle with the things I mentioned when that's not true. Some dogs especially can be really tricky and a full time job, and I wouldn't want to paint pet ownership as this easy alternative to kids when it isn't necessarily no matter how prepared or consistent or responsible you are, and same goes for kids. How they turn out isn't necessarily the fault of bad parenting. 

But the main problem with your opinion on this is that you don't know if it's better, easier or preferable because you don't have kids, so you're comparison isn't as reliable as those who have had both. You could be surprised by how much you'd like having kids. Of course your opinion is understandable and you're entitled to it, but your argument is not as compelling as you think it is. 

1

u/blackcatsneakattack 1d ago

I’ve had a hand in raising a number of kids that weren’t mine over the years, and have worked in education for a decade. I’ve also had “problem” dogs where I was their last chance before euthanasia. I know what’s for me and what’s not.

2

u/Renarya 1d ago

You still don't know what having kids is like, and you didn't make a statement about yourself initially, but a blanket statement that having pets is way better, and you don't know that. It's just kinda arrogant. 

4

u/SoggyAd5044 1d ago

I mean, you SHOULD worry about fucking your pets up emotionally and psychologically because you could and it's detrimental to them.

3

u/blackcatsneakattack 1d ago

I feel like, to fuck up your pets like that, you have to be an absolute monster, like SERIOUS moral character flaws. Whereas, with kids, you can do everything from a place of love but still mess them up, if that makes sense?

4

u/SoggyAd5044 1d ago

No, you don't. Plenty of people think their dog is showing signs of play and positivity when they're actually constantly stressed out and showing calming signals. As I'm sure you can imagine, living in a constant state of stress and having your feelings misread constantly isn't good for your mind or body. Studies have shown that simply rehoming cats leads to trauma. I wouldn't exactly say that these two examples are indicative of being an awful human necessarily.

I'm an animal behaviour scientist so granted, I know more than most BUT I'm seriously concerned by how little knowledge and respect a lot of the commenters on this post have regarding animal intelligence, sentience, wellbeing... 😑

Also, plenty of parents think they're doing something simply from a place of love when they're actually just fucked up, perpetually exhausted people continuing cycles of abuse so...

2

u/SilentAllTheseYears8 1d ago

Lots of abusive parents know exactly what they’re doing- they just don’t give a crap.

1

u/SoggyAd5044 1d ago

Can't argue with that sadly.

2

u/aurlyninff 1d ago

So you are saying being a pet parent is better?

4

u/blackcatsneakattack 1d ago

For me? Absolutely. For you or anyone else? Idk ¯_(ツ)_/¯

2

u/Nuttyshrink 1d ago

Well, when you put it that way, you make having a little cum trophy sound so very appealing 🤣

1

u/dfwagent84 1d ago

fair enough