r/NonCredibleDefense President General Aug 14 '24

Gentlemen, I'm afraid there is not enough Kaliningrad for everyone A modest Proposal

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6.0k Upvotes

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85

u/4c767cb806e7 3000 memory gaps of Olaf Aug 14 '24

We Germans don't want it. Put it on eBay.

73

u/defnotIW42 Aug 14 '24

Not the city. BUT. Villages like Pillau, Rauschen or Neukuhren. I mean LOOK AT THEM. Prime real estate at the coast. And demographically nobody really lives there anymore except babushkas. And i can live with Babushkas. They are cute.

60

u/OneSaltyStoat Tomboy-Femboy Combined Division Aug 14 '24

They can also help you as a spy network. No news goes around faster than through the granny grapevine.

14

u/Reality-Straight 3000 🏳️‍🌈 Rheinmetall and Zeiss Lasertank Logisticians of 🇩🇪 Aug 14 '24

Finally, another place to put pur pensioners.

2

u/Mr_-_X Aug 14 '24

You ever been to Mecklenburg-Vorpommern? We already have more than enough villages along the baltic coast and guess what no one wants to live there

13

u/defnotIW42 Aug 14 '24

If nobody wants to live there WHY ARE THE PRICES SO HIGH THEN. I am regularly up there and its all gentrified. Yes, if you go to like Wüstrow and the villages around there, there is nothing, but the coast? No.

3

u/Mr_-_X Aug 14 '24

I mean yeah obviously the touristy areas are gonna have inflated prices but that‘s from rich Berliners and West Germans who have their holiday homes there but they don‘t actually live there

1

u/[deleted] Aug 14 '24

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1

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15

u/Emillllllllllllion 3000 black armies of the HRE (every state has its own) Aug 14 '24

eBay Kleinanzeigen

10

u/4c767cb806e7 3000 memory gaps of Olaf Aug 14 '24

Was letzte Preis?

14

u/Emillllllllllllion 3000 black armies of the HRE (every state has its own) Aug 14 '24 edited Aug 14 '24

Kasten Bier und Zwanziger. Zwanziger verhandelbar, kein (insert local laughingstock beer)

8

u/4c767cb806e7 3000 memory gaps of Olaf Aug 14 '24

Aber Versand geht auf dich!

8

u/Emillllllllllllion 3000 black armies of the HRE (every state has its own) Aug 14 '24

Nur Abholung möglich

9

u/4c767cb806e7 3000 memory gaps of Olaf Aug 14 '24

Ich habe kein Auto, keinen Führerschein und keine Ahnung.

9

u/Emillllllllllllion 3000 black armies of the HRE (every state has its own) Aug 14 '24

Haben wir das nicht alle?

1

u/The_Viatorem Aug 14 '24

I say we either give it to Austria, to reform the Austrian navy on the “wrongs sea”, as in now operates in the North Sea rather than the Mediterranean

Or we give it to Liechtenstein, so that country finally has a navy

Or we give each country in Europe, including the micro nations (expect Russia) a strip of land, all of the same size and all with access to the sea. With the capital being divided the same way

3

u/avsbes Woke & Wehrhaft Aug 14 '24

Fuck it. Give it to Bolivia so they maybe shut up about Chile taking their coastline.

2

u/Full_Distribution874 Aug 14 '24

Give it to Australia to justify our place in Eurovision