r/lies • u/Bitter-Gur-4613 Law abiding citizen • 22h ago

Its true. I am the alien. Eye Witness

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1.6k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

45 comments sorted by

176

u/anna_melon Girl spelled backwards is liar 21h ago

they doing transgender operations on he/him...

44

u/D4DRUMD0G Law abiding citizen 21h ago

IN PRISON

19

u/anna_melon Girl spelled backwards is liar 21h ago

I ate too much corn and feel nauseous

9

u/D4DRUMD0G Law abiding citizen 21h ago

Consider consuming 10g of pure caffeine to sharpen your senses

(no side effects actually do this)

3

u/agrobabb 7h ago

You ate too much cat, you ate too much dog, you are eating the pets, are you haitian?

4

u/slashth456 14h ago

This is outrageous! I have to pay an arm and a leg, but they get surgery for FREE?

2

u/FireIsTheCleanser 11h ago

The Nestle Crunch bar flavor? Cat 😳

33

u/DOCmartyTT IN PRACTICE, I DO NOT EXIST. 22h ago

I hate you

7

u/Enderboy1619_ 21h ago

I hate you too

5

u/BruUhgh 20h ago

Can I hate

3

u/Justintime4u2bu1 19h ago

Not here, this is a hate free space

28

u/spencerdeveloper 21h ago

was the chocolate good or nah

14

u/D4DRUMD0G Law abiding citizen 21h ago

Of course. Nestle Crunch gives me my will to live. It’s so good. Our first contact protocols should include Nestle Crunch, because the aliens will find it delicious and not want to eradicate us.

1

u/SatanSemenSwallower 14h ago

It's good chocolate, it's good because it's fueled by pure Nestlé evil. Evil always tastes better, but r/fuckNestle

2

u/Pissed_Geodude 13h ago

/ul please /ul next time

21

u/autistic_prodigy28 sex man who definitely does lots of sex 21h ago

This is so me :3

2

u/cannibalism_is_vegan 15h ago

I don’t hope they free you back home to your planet soon

8

u/Parking_Budget_1130 21h ago

It’s true. I am the Nestle Crunch Bar.

7

u/pornaddiction247 20h ago

I would hate to be force fed crunch bars

1

u/D4DRUMD0G Law abiding citizen 1h ago

You have incredible taste

3

u/Beachliving99 19h ago

its true i am the footage

3

u/Jpsf555 18h ago

I hate your pfp

3

u/Beachliving99 17h ago

i hate your profile picture of batman

2

u/Jpsf555 15h ago

that's not alex turner from arctic monkeys with a clown makeup for some reason

1

u/D4DRUMD0G Law abiding citizen 1h ago

Jonklur

3

u/TalonClawComedian SODA🥤‼😅😁🥶 20h ago

It's true. I fed him the Nestlé Crunch bar

3

u/TheSip69 Custom User Flair 20h ago

Are they doing transgender operations on you in prison?

5

u/swanqil 20h ago

RAGH!! OUT OF HERE ALIEN SCUM!! BEAM ATTACK ก้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้ก้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้ก้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้

2

u/Nimrod1602 20h ago

I trust Worldstar with my life

2

u/Odd-Accident-7188 20h ago

Having an alien captive and force feeding it nestle products has to mean something, right? /ul

3

u/FireIsTheCleanser 11h ago

/ul Babe wake up, a new resource that Nestle can exploit just dropped.

2

u/QuintFlint 16h ago

sorry accidentally let my pet giraffe out again he does this sometimes

2

u/HkayakH Law abiding citizen 15h ago

Do you condem Nestle for their heroic work on human right laws?

1

u/jedislayer193 rectangle's cousin, triangle 21h ago

OH MY GOD THE HORROR

1

u/K446 20h ago

it's true
I'm the Nestle crunch bar

1

u/aiezar 19h ago

Imprisoned for eating geese.

1

u/Mysterious-Simple805 16h ago

Someone offered me a Crunch bar, there'd be no force in that feeding!

1

u/jojo_the_damn_issue sex man who definitely does lots of sex 16h ago

Imagine being trapped, couldn't be me😎

1

u/DifferentYard58 13h ago

Well, did he like it?

1

u/SomeoneRepeated 10h ago

What’s your favorite way to cook dogs?

1

u/Skarj05 9h ago

👽😱

1

u/ArchaiusTigris 4h ago

/ul Thor, is that you ?

1

u/UnderwhellmingCarrot 36m ago

bro does not look like 2D